Fear

you never know how much fear you have in your self until something happens and fear takes over your body. this last sunday was just a normal sunday; went to church, hung out with friends afterwards, went and played with cais, just like i do every sunday. i was coming home and walked out of the powell station and all i hear pure caos. and then a seconds laster i hear BOOM BOOM BOOM (gun shots). all that was going through my head is to try and find a safe place to go, but i didn't know where the gun shots came from. out of no where, teen agers started coming around the corner in packs of 10-15 just screaming and up to no good. i over heard some of the kids talking about how there was a shooting up on mason and the wrong person was shot. but they just kept talking about it and laughing. in the mean time groups were just growing and growing. fights would break out and then break up. i was standing there on the corner trying to get through 9-1-1 but no one was picking up. when i was on the phone trying to get through one of the groups pushed one of the girls in the street and just started beating up on her. they hit her so hard she just feel to the ground. a crowd started to gather around this girl and cheer the girls on as they at this point were kicking her and telling her that she needed to watch he back and that they were going to get the guy who shot the other person to come and do the same thing to her too (in-between each word was some kind of curse word). at this point i was scared out of my mind and didn't know what to do. it took everything in me to not go and help the girl. i was scared to think what would happen to myself if i would of tried to help her. the forever 21 security guard walked me and 4 other people across the street so we could walk through the hotel and be safe. i was shaking at this point and couldn't believe my eyes for what i had just seen and for what i had just heard. i so wanted to just try and erase it from my mind, but just couldn't. that night i found my self waking up every 10 minutes or so with the picture of the girl on the ground and the group of people kicking her and cheering. who in their sick mind cheers someone else on when they are kicking someone.

i feel like there is just so much that has been going on here in the city. two weeks ago we had a shooting right in front of our building. people for some reason are just getting angry and shooting everyone up, it feels like. i am never scared when walking out side at night or when i walk home from the muni after babysitting on sudnay nights. but i think that starting now until things calm down, there will be fear that i now will have going through my mind.

i have posted the link of the article about the shooting that happen on sunday night at 9pm on mason and geary.

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/c/a/2010/08/09/BAS61ER9CI.DTL